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i just came from church & Hafizah's late birthday celebration. it was a lot of fun, especially when it came to one of her cousins i suppose. Hazirah & i couldn't stop laughing at his weird movements & his mumblings. i guess he's a special child but the way he acted towards me was really freaky. seriously. he kept coming nearer & nearer to my face when i was sitting down i accidentally pushed him away by force. sorry kiddo, i didn't mean to. Fyee, sorry eh. the rest of the girls kept laughing & teasing me. che, argh! (; had a good time. i would compliment the food especially & Mailan/LuLu is the most handsome & most hot baby i've ever seen! he's half french, you know!(;

Okay now, BESTEEY!
Stay strong. I L O V E Y O U! Don't forget that. Although, I've had my flaws, I've always cared for you. I'm worried. Fullstop. Very worried. No matter what you're going through now, don't burden yourself too much. I understand there are things you have to do on your own. Been there, done that. We're always open to share the load. Anyway, that's what friends are for. Don't leave me. Someday, if I need to use force, I'll use it. I'll take that mask off of you. You'll make it through the pain. You're MY best friend. You'll always be mine to call best friend.
okay, so this is what Besteey said in her blog.

i really appreciate your concern. but tell me my dearest Besteey, what can you do if i can't do anything already?); i'd love to take this burden away from my life but it's not about comfortability. it's comformity to be like Christ. i'm scarred & bruised by all my trials right now, but i'm being tested at the same time. these are my deepest darkest trials & even though i find it so hard to carry on, i still have to go through it. i'm leaving you not because i want to Bes, you know i'll never do such a thing. but like i said, who am i to argue for what makes me happy when my parents say this is what's best. i don't understand what's so good about it either when i already found my place with all of you but i can't have my way... it sucks, really & i'm so so sorry Besteey. I L O V E Y O U too. you've been the best & i've always loved you. but we won't be far apart. you'll always be in my heart. we'll make time for each other. promise me you won't ever forget me nor will you ever neglect me... i really pray that you'll forever consider me as your best friend no matter the distance.